Guys, Are You Posting These 7 Terrible Pictures on your Dating Profile?

Perusing dating sites and apps is more often than not an uncomfortable experience, especially for women looking for men. There are some cringeworthy profiles out there. One of the biggest places guys screw up when making their profile is choosing their pictures. Good god, there are things I will never unsee. But it's not just the creepers and actual garbage people who are making terrible profiles; normal guys are killing their chances too. So, I'm addressing you normal guys who are just a little dating-site-inept. Here're a few things you're doing wrong when it comes to the photos you're posting on your dating profile:

  1. Showcasing your latest kill.

    Do you know girls love? Animals. Do you know what girls don't like? Dead animals. Do you know what girls also don't like? The guy that's the reason that animal is dead.

    Girls like a guy who can provide for them, but the need to prove that you're a good hunter-gatherer is a little outdated, don't you think?

    Sure, some girls like hyper-masculine guys that hunt and drink beer and drive a pick-up truck. There are girls that hunt and don't mind the site of a freshly dead animal. But there's a good portion of girls - who may or may not be into hunting - that won't be super stoked on you taking a picture with dead Bambi.

    I guess he's with his mom up in deer heaven… What? Too soon?

  2. Making us play 'Where's Wal-bro?'

    We live in a swipe-right world. We're impatient and lazy. We want to know who you are and what you're about instantly. And when you strictly post group photos with the same 4 to 5 of your buddies, you disrupt our flow. You make us search for you.

    We're forced to try to pick you out of a sea of bro tanks and snapbacks. The fact of the matter is a lot of us wont try to figure out who you are and won't think twice before passing you by.

    Even if you think you look damn good in a group picture, make your main photo a solo pic. Enable our laziness so that you might increase your chances of getting laid.

  3. Being like Banksy in the worst possible way.

    Okay, so you snowboard. That's neat. Cool, you right motocross. All that's fine and dandy, and potentially attractive. But if you're only posting pictures of yourself doing things in a full facemask how do you expect us to know what you look like?

    Showing your dating pool that you're capable of cool, athletic things is definitely something you should be doing on your profile. However, showing off your face is pretty important too.

  4. Posting pics like a wannabe Hugh Hefner.

    Okay, you're on a dating site to get a girl right? So riddle me this: why do you want to post pictures of you with a hot girl(s) on your arm?

    If you're trying to play to the idea that girls want what they can't have, stop.

    Girls don't need you creating a competition for your affection.

    If they do go for it, which they probably won't, that means they'll stop chasing you as soon as they have you and focus on some other seemingly unattainable target.

    If, and when, they don't go for it then you potentially missed a really great opportunity.

  5. Throwing back to your bad Myspace phase.

    For the love of god, take selfies at a slight downward angle. Don't post any photos taken at a backbreakingly high angle or risk looking like you haven't mentally matured since 2008.

  6. Flexing way too hard.

    We get it, bruh. You go to the gym a lot. Put your abs away.

    There's no shame in showing off your body, especially if you spend a lot of time getting fit or if you're looking for a gym going gf. But there's a difference in showing that you're confident in your bangin' body and coming off as an arrogant gym rat.

    Try to limit yourself to one shirtless or flexing picture. Trust me, us girls can get a pretty good idea of how fit you are through something as thick as a winter coat. We've basically trained ourselves to instantly identify hotness.

  7. Turning your profile into a used car ad.

    While girls understand - or atleast pretend to understand - the special bond between a man and his car, it's unlikely any girl will really care to see photos of your sweet ride from twelve different angles.

    I can almost guarantee that most girls will only care that your car runs and is somewhat clean on the inside.

    Having a car is a sign that you're a normal, stable human being unless you live in a city than it doesn't really matter, but your car shouldn't be one of your best qualities.

    We want to date you, not your Ford Focus.

  8. Curating an odd collection of photos that aren't of you.

    To add on my previous point, why would you post pictures of things that aren't you? There are countless guys on dating sites who post pictures of not only their car, but their gun, neat samurai sword, or favorite sports stadium.

    My question is why?

    It makes a whole lot more sense to detail your obsession with the 49ers in your bio. And that way we don't think you're an inanimate object.

    However, the one exception to this rule is dogs. Post pictures of your dogs. Just do it. Your chances of female attention sky-rocket if you have a dog.

  9. Forgetting to clean your room.

    On a first date you put your best foot forward, do you not? And if you thought you had any chance of getting laid after said date, you'd be sure to clean your room right? So why would you post pictures of you with your filthy room or disgusting bathroom as a backdrop?

    Not caring to wipe the toothpaste splatter off your mirror before taking a selfie really says something about how little you care about presenting yourself to the world.

    Later in a relationship, you'll see how neat or messy your partner is. But that happens behind closed doors.

    Don't broadcast your bad habits. Take selfies in a clean room or atleast against a wall so no one can tell that you haven't done laundry in six months.

  10. Your pics are funny, but the joke's on you.

    Girls like to laugh. When asked to list what they find attractive in a guy, 'a sense of humor' usually makes an appearance on every girl's list.

    But there's definitely such a thing as taking it too far.

    If all of your pictures are you dressed goofy or pulling some stupid face, then you'll off the vibe that you're not capable of any serious emotion. If you're looking for a long term thing, or even just a hookup, show that you're capable of being somewhat serious.

  11. Why so serious?

    Just like being too funny can work against you, so can being too serious.

    If you're not smiling in your pictures or don't have any photos of you looking like you're having any inkling of fun then you might give off the impression that you take yourself too seriously.

    Post pictures of you with your friends, of you doing athletic things, or that hilarious picture from Halloween last year. You know the one. Show off your personality!

  12. You're not Kim K, don't recreate Selfish.

    If you're not familiar with Selfish, it's essentially a coffee table book of Kim Kardashian's selfies.

    What I'm trying to say is you shouldn't only have seflies up on your profile. If you do you might look like you're boring, literally have no friends, or are way too into yourself.

    Prove that you leave your apartment by posting pictures of you on vacations or out partying with your friends.

  13. We get it, you party.

    Girls like to party just like anyone else. But a lot of girls want someone who's balanced. You might give off the vibe that all you do is party if you only have pictures of you partying on your profile.

    If you're coming off as a party animal girls might think you're incapable of commitment and only care about getting drunk.

    Throw in some pictures of you doing literally anything else but partying. You want to show that you're capable of having fun without being absolutely hammered.