Sexual attraction is the driving force behind a lot of things in life.
As wrong as that may sound, it is ultimately true.
Many times in life, with certain people, sexual attraction is the only thing exchanged between two people. This can lead to a lot of carefree and enjoyable fun, but that's not always the case.
Sometimes, one person in that couple of two has more than just a sexual attraction -- they have emotions. And sometimes, this can cause that person to do anything and every thing in order for the other to feel emotions as well. Sadly, and most of the time, it doesn't happen that way.
What I'm specifically referring to in this article is having sex on the first date.
If you find yourself going on a date with someone you actually enjoy and find yourself interested in -- not just sexually interested -- then refrain from sleeping with them on the first date.
Now, this isn't a matter of respecting yourself; it's a matter of your date working for you and ensuring that there's room for your relationship together to grow further than a single day. If you're merely after some fun and not looking for a relationship, then do what you please. Hell, sleep with not only your date on the first night, but even your waiter as well.
This article is for those who are looking to ensure a second date and establish a real connection with your date, not just a night of fun. Read on to discover five reasons why you should not have sex on the first date.
Speaking from personal experience, there is nothing that turns me onto someone more than multiple interactions that merely build up the suspense and curiosity for one another. Why I enjoy this so much is because multiple interactions allow you time between to imagine the type of sex you two would have and what you'd like to do to them.
Seeing someone on multiple, different occasions also allows you to solidify your interest in them. Maybe you were just horny the first time you met or thought they were dressed cute. Waiting to make a move can help confirm your sexual interest in them and even strengthen it. It also gives you the opportunity to make a great impression time and time again, possibly strengthening their interest in you.
Build up the suspense and sexual interests.
With many things in life, waiting is worth the reward. I bet you find yourself even more hungry and excited for your food after having to wait, instead of going to a fast food joint and getting it immediately. Same thing with sex. Treat yourself to a sit-down restaurant and avoid the fast food joints that don't always deliver and sometimes mess up your order.
It can be very difficult for people to separate their emotions from the primal and physical act of sexual intercourse.
When you really break it down, sex is merely a way of reproducing and ensuring the survival of one's genes. It's the whirlwind of emotions that makes it so exciting and pleasurable -- an act of fun instead of an act of survival. So for those who are able to sleep around and keep emotions out of the equation, they must be having some pretty empty sex.
And that is exactly the type of sex you'll be having if you decide to play it easy after a single date. The emotionless mentality of the situation won't make it raw or exhilarating; it'll make it awkward and uncomfortable.
Maybe the sex was exhilarating -- maybe it's even the best sex you've ever had, and you can't stop thinking about it. Too bad it meant nothing more to them than a moment of pleasure, and now you're stuck chasing what can't be caught.
Sex between two people who have strong feelings for another -- shit, even between two people who actually know each other -- is far more exciting, raw, and orgasmic than when between two horny acquaintances.
Ah, the oldest mind trick in the book. Everybody wants what they can't have.
If you want your date to respect you and see you as a potential lover, don't sleep with them on the first date. If they want you after simply meeting you once, imagine how bad they'll want you after a few dates.
You may be afraid that they'll lose interest in you if you don't have sex with them, but if they don't respect your decision and can't wait, then they weren't worth your time in the first place.
Someone who is truly interested in you will respect your decision, and then fuck the shit outta ya when deemed appropriate. Waiting will eat away at the both of you as you imagine all the different ways it may go down when the time is right. After a few more dates, you two will be ripping each other's clothes off and squirming at every little touch.
Waiting will ensure and strengthen your desires for another, as well as your appreciation and respect for one other.
It's okay to admit it: sex can be awkward somtimes. We're not perfect and we're definitely not all porn stars. Hell, first dates are awkward and uncomfortable.
Sex for the first time with anyone can be uncomfortable, just imagine how uncomfortable and weird it may be with someone you just met. It usually takes a few go's before figuring out how to turn on your partner, what they like and don't like. Sex on the first date doesn't allow for any of that.
Jumping right into the lake before even checking the water for its depth or any creatures lurking out of sight (STDs) can be a dangerous risk. That is always a factor you should consider. Allowing a few dates to test the waters and get a feel for the type of swimmer your date may be can greatly benefit the both of you.
Sex on the first date then presents another awkward dilemma of, "Are they going to leave or stay? Should I get them an uber or wait to see what they do?" Not having an established relationship between the two of you has the potential to create countless uncomfortable and unflattering moments if you decide to have sex on the first date.
It's almost like you're an entirely different person sometimes!
Speaking from experience, I've found myself attracted to some pretty, unpretty girls when I'm walking around town all sexually charged. My judgment has gone out the door, and anyone sporting a pair of boobs and a nice ass is calling my name.
Sex clouds judgment and leads to rash, instinctual decisions.
Even worse, great sex can make you fall in love. So let's say you decide to have sex on the first date and it isn't awkward and uncomfortable as discussed above -- it can happen. Now what? Soon enough, you find yourself daydreaming about this person, wanting to text them and wanting to be with them. But, do you really even know this person?
Sex can cause you to get into situations that you may later regret or think, "How did I end up here?" Sex can be one of the most pleasurable, yet also demoralizing acts out there -- just depends on how smart you are about it.
All in all, having an excellent first date should be your main priority. If you need any help with that, here's a great article on what NOT to do for a first date.